Planes, Trains, and Various Automobiles

As extra as I may seem (I am.), I find happiness in the simple things in life such as doing nothing, sunbathing, and eating. All signs that point to the motherland — Greece. For those of you who don’t follow my #content on various social media platforms, I was lucky enough to spend my spring break in Mykonos of which the only activities available at this time of year are those listed above.

Let me set the scene, its 10am and Isabella and I have just strolled in to breakfast at the hotel. We consider our options for the day; Do we head into town? Explore the area? Go to the beach? No, no, and absolutely not. My only accomplishment of the day will be accomplishing nothing. I consider asking the manager if she has some olive oil I could use as tanning oil — I’ve done it before and I’m desperate for the summer gleaux. I decided that was a weird request so, I did not ask it.


I’m laying out on our jumbo sized patio (You would think we spend upwards of $300 a night on this room, we didn’t.) music straight bumpin’ — loving life. Hours earlier I had used 3 types of transportation to get to this very blissful moment. The RER from Gare du Nord to CDG, Swiss Air flight from Paris to Zurich, flight from Zurich to Athens, flight from Athens to Mykonos, and a car from the airport to the hotel. And me, pushing the same return schedule out of my mind, decide to enjoy my few days in paradise.

I feel like I should mention that Greek people are the nicest people in the world, or maybe its just because I speak Greek. It was odd, something about my last visit to Greece made my memories cloudy and stopped me from remembering the reality of it. I have never really thought of Greece as my favorite place in the world — I reserve that for London (the epitome of wealth) but this trip made me realize something.


For the first time in months (since living in Paris) I had felt at home. Like I was visiting distant aunts and uncles that only wanted to help me. It was the first time I haven’t struggled with a language barrier since moving and it was a breath of fresh fucking air.

Moving on from that emo shit, day 2 was less productive for my tan which I was unhappy about. It is very hard to be titties out with 65 degree weather and 24 mile an hour winds. We relaxed nonetheless but only after I stayed true to the klutz I try to hide every day.


As Isabella and I attempted to find a beach (remember 24mph winds) I tripped and fucked up my knee and hand. Isabella, ever the crunchy bitch she is, turned around looked at me deadpan said “You’re fine.” and continued walking. Me, ever the dramatic bitch I am, was shocked at her passiveness to my possibly broken knee.

We came, we saw, we ate, and then left the way we came — with one car, three planes, and a train. I should mention, I will be on a boat back to New York because I never want to see a plane again in my life.


P.S. Something about the sun in Greece gives you a tan unlike any other.

P.P.S. Here are some of the best quotes of the trip:

“I have never wanted to listen to Drake in my life.” – Isabella

“Stop doing the most and start doing better.” – Both

“The bigger you are, the larger you are.” – A Tumblr post that I take credit for

*looks at Greek salad* “If there are capers in this I’ll bust a nut.” – Me

*Capers in salad mouthing to Isabella* “I nutted.”

“We’re all gonna get cancer one day Isabella, it’s in the air, let me tan without sunscreen.” – Me

“Gym, tan, laundry.” – Isabella

“BUT” *moves finger in twisting motion* – Both

“Don’t be suspicious.” – Both

“Mykonoooooooooosss” *said in a sing son fashion* – Both

“Ladies and gentlemen, my friend Dr. Richard Kimble” (but you have to say it in a quasi German accent) – Isabella

*in refrence to a very specific vine* “If your name is junior and you’re really handsome, come on raise your hand!” – Both



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